She (he) Dreams In Monochrome

Slowly but surely, I'm gaining some ground on the color front.

Please excuse the wonky navigation. Our scientists are hard at work devising a new system that will (maybe) knock your pragmatic socks off!

Meanwhile, I'll be turning toward a piece of software that just maybe has diverted my addiction from Taleworld's black tar heroine of a game, Mount and Blade.

Two Worlds.

I know! It's badness is practically legend... for those who only stuck with it for about fifteen minutes. I was guilty of the same moments after I snatched it off the digital shelves at GOG.com. I found the presentation down right insulting, and listening to that dialogue had me squirming uncomfortably in my already butt-numbing-ly uncomfortable computer chair. Like when you're watching the A-Team, or some similar show, and somebody says something goofy at the end and protagonists A and B have a hearty chuckle at protagonist C's antics. Freeze frame. Totally embarrassing stuff.

Seriously, it's like they paid the voice actors a pool of 5 dollars to lay a sprawling minefield of "Forsooth"s, "Aye verily"s and Mayhaps"es across the span of the game.

Despite all that, somehow, somewhere, the magic kicks in. Once you get past the janky animation, horrible pre-rendered cutscenes and laughable (yet somehow not completely cringe worthy) ren fair voice overs there is a good and vast game in there. I promise. Or I'm a blue assed knave's unle.

Aye, forsooth.

-Matt